Speaking with a colleague recently, I explained that I planned to host webinars and other speaking engagements to help small business owners and individuals get organized. She then told me that she was planning an informational meeting for local people who may want to learn more about a product she is selling. While we were talking, we realized how nervous we were about speaking in front of people. We started to say the “What if?” scenarios: What if no one shows? What if I don’t remember what to say? Etc… As we spoke, the topic came up: how do you talk spontaneously with others without separating yourself from them? How do you keep the conversation going and leave them with what you wanted them to know? These are the questions I will tackle today.
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If you run a solo or small business (1–5 employees), spontaneous speaking isn’t optional. It’s happening every day. It’s the elevator pitch at a networking event, the unscripted answer on a discovery call, the quick explanation to a new referral partner. Unlike a keynote, you don’t get days to prepare. You need a repeatable system you can lean on in the moment, which is exactly what the tips below give you.
Estimated reading time: 8 minutes
Topics
Key Takeaways
- Spontaneous speaking is essential for small business owners during meetings and networking.
- Many people feel anxious about spontaneous speaking, but recognizing that fear is a first step.
- Use a clear structure like Problem, Solution, Benefit to guide your responses.
- Engage using conversational language, and stay present by focusing on the conversation at hand.
- Practice these skills in low-stakes scenarios to build confidence for higher-stakes conversations.
What is spontaneous speaking?
Spontaneous speaking is what we do when there’s no script. It is not for scripted presentations or other scripted events. Some examples are introducing people, meeting new people, networking, giving surprise speeches, and meeting people at conferences.
Are you nervous about speaking about topics in public, around strangers, or in smaller groups?
In the video below, Matt Abrahams (speaker) says that 85% of people feel nervous when speaking in public. I think it is probably a safe (affiliate) estimate. It may even be more. But why are we anxious just thinking about public speaking? It could be a variety of reasons, like you don’t want to feel vulnerable, you don’t want to look foolish, you don’t feel you have something worthy to say, etc I could go on and on. But you get the picture. Here are the tips I got from the video below.
How to feel more comfortable when speaking on the fly
Recognize that you are anxious.
Take a deep breath and say, “I can do this. It’s significant.” Visit my post about Confidence Building Affirmations for Female Entrepreneurs for more ideas.
Create a structure that you would use to set up the conversation.
There are a few types of structures that can help you speak at the moment. Matt mentions these in great detail and has exercises to accompany them.
Problem or Opportunity: What problem are you trying to solve for the audience? Solution: What is the solution to the problem? Benefits: Why will these solutions improve your situation?
What is it?
Why is it important?
What are the next steps? OR if you are talking about a person,
Who are they?
Why are they important?
What are we going to do next?
Use conversational language.
People need to relate to you, so use no big words! Speak to them as if you were talking to a friend at a coffee (affiliate) shop. Be casual to draw in the audience and not alienate the recipients.
Get out of your head and dare to take a risk.
In the video below, Matt provides many examples and exercises. Don’t overevaluate your process. Think of it as an “opportunity” rather than a threat. It’s a positive, not a negative, experience.
Being present while speaking to others.
How do you do this? Well, first, you need to not think about anything but the conversation at hand. Find something that will bring you to the present without thinking about the future. Some examples are saying tongue twisters out loud, listening to a particular song, and walking around the building before the event. Matt used this Tongue Twister, which I had never heard of before. Try it and see if it helps to become present at the moment.
I slit the sheet, the sheet I slit, and on the slitted sheet, I sit.
On a side note, while researching this topic, I found this great site. If you find that when practicing speaking out loud you have issues with particular sounds, this site has tongue twisters that will help you with those sounds. Diction Exercises
Where Solopreneurs Use Spontaneous Speaking Most
As a small business owner, you don’t need a stage to benefit from these skills. Here’s where they show up most:
- Networking events. Someone asks, “So what do you do?” Your 30-second answer is spontaneous speaking in action.
- Discovery or sales calls. A prospect asks an unexpected question, and you need to respond clearly without a script.
- Referral introductions. A colleague introduces you to a potential client on the spot, and you get one shot to make it count.
- Team check-ins. If you have employees, explaining a change in direction clearly and calmly (even when you’re still figuring it out yourself) builds trust.
- Client check-in calls. Explaining a delay, a price change, or next steps without over-rehearsing keeps the relationship human.
The structures Matt Abraham’s outlines above Problem/Solution/Benefit, or What/Why/Next Steps work well in all five of these situations. Practice them on lower-stakes conversations first so they feel natural when it counts.
Well, there you have it: ways to help you be more spontaneous when speaking with others. These skills need to be practiced repeatedly to become natural. Start by changing your mindset to talk this way.
If you want to watch the entire video, it is an hour long; here it is below.
Now it’s your turn! Do you feel anxious when speaking on the fly with others? What happens when you feel anxious? How do you deal with the anxiety? Please share your comments below. I would love to hear from you.
Frequently Asked Questions About Spontaneous Speaking
Spontaneous speaking is unscripted communication, responding in the moment without prepared notes. It’s different from a rehearsed presentation because you’re reacting to a real conversation as it unfolds, like introducing yourself at a networking event or answering a surprise question on a call.
Start by naming the anxiety out loud to yourself (“I’m nervous, and that’s normal”), then rely on a simple structure, like Problem, Solution, Benefit, so you’re not starting from a blank page. Practicing the structure on easy, low-stakes conversations builds the muscle for higher-stakes ones.
Two reliable ones: Problem → Solution → Benefit (what’s the issue, how do you solve it, why does that matter), or What → Why → Next Steps (what it is, why it matters, what happens next). Both give you a mental outline in seconds.
Yes. Spontaneous speaking is a practiced skill, not a personality trait. Structure, conversational language, and grounding techniques (like the tongue twister above) work regardless of whether you’re naturally outgoing.
Public speaking is usually planned and one-directional. Spontaneous speaking happens in two-way conversation: networking, sales calls, referral intros, where you don’t control the questions coming at you.
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Want Support Communicating Your Business Clearly — On and Off the Page?
Speaking on the fly is one skill. Having consistent, professional messaging across your website, social media, and client communications is another. If you’d rather delegate the writing and admin side so you can focus on the conversations that grow your business, explore Sabrina’s Admin Services’ suite of support services — built specifically for solopreneurs and small businesses with 1–5 employees. From social media marketing to website help to virtual consultations that keep you accountable, we handle the backend so your spontaneous moments land well.
Visit our other management and leadership posts for more.
Please note these are affiliate links through Amazon (affiliate), and at no additional cost to you, I will earn affiliate fees if you decide to make a purchase.
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As speaking in front of others is not something I find that scary, probably because I used to be an academic and was used to have to ‘defend’ what I had written, like everybody else had to do too, in front of the whole seminar group. So I often find it quite fun to talk in front of others. However, I agree with your nice article here that it is good to relate to your audience, be present in the moment and not use too complicated a language. 🙂
Hi Sabrina 🙂
Awesome post! I have never really thought about how to speak spontaneous lol will be using your tips to help me 🙂 Thank you!
I once overheard a man talking about his preferred way to deal with public speaking anxiety. His solution is to take an anxiety-reducing drug. I kid you not.
Training to be a teacher, I lost most of my fear of public speaking back in college. Being in the flow of what I’m teaching is the biggest help. If I’m not in teaching mode, spontaneous speech is more challenging for me. I love the “little things” in the video.
I have found that I am in the 15% I live to speak. I thrive on the energy but many people I run into would rather do anything else but speak in front of people. These are great tips
Having been a teacher, I am comfortable speaking in front of others, whether scripted or not. I think you hit the nail on the head with “eing present while speaking to others.” So many times, we’re formulating our answer instead of truly listening. Good stuff!
I belonged to Toastmasters for a while and suggest this as a great way to practice and gain experience. The tongue twisters are wonderful. However, need lots of practice with the “S’s”. Also, thanks for including the video.
One of the things I’ve noticed is that we need to prepare to be spontaneous – sounds a bit like an oxymoron, I know. BUT – when I know my stuff, when I’m on my A game, on-the-fly conversations are much easier. And, yes, staying in the moment is always a challenge for me. I’ll have to try the tongue twister approach – that’s a new one for me! Thanks for a well-though-out post.